Please let me introduce myself
I am a (wo)man of influence and taste
I've been around since the Ummah began
Sold out many a Muslim's faith
I was around when Mir Jafar let down
Bengal for the East India Company men.
I made sure I went to Downing Street
As they bombed my Afghan brethren
I'm pleased to meet you
I hope you guessed my name
What is that troubling you?
Are you just jealous of my fame?